Dating during the pandemic

With dine-in at restaurants disallowed and other popular dating venues and activities being closed during the movement restrictions, how do couples date? Photo: Filepic

Dating during the pandemic is certainly a challenge. With dine-in at restaurants disallowed and other popular dating venues and activities closed during the movement restrictions, how do couples date?

For café owner Su-Ann Ramachandran, 50, and her boyfriend, expatriate lecturer Mathieu Arnaud, 60, where there’s a will, there will surely be a way.

The couple started dating in Feb 2020, just a month before the first movement control order.

“We first met five years ago at a mutual friend’s party and both of us were with different partners at that time. So it wasn’t until just before the pandemic last year when we met again that we got together,” says Su-Ann, who lives in Kuala Lumpur.

“We didn’t realise we lived in the same neighbourhood until we happened to run into each other one day,” says Arnaud who has been living in Malaysia for 20 years.

And that was how the romance started.

“We went to a French restaurant in town and had a lovely time,” recalls Su-Ann.

“We talked and talked, and discovered that we had a lot in common, and we wanted to talk even more and meet more often,” adds Arnaud, who is from Paris, France.

Both of them discovered they had a common love for food and travelling.

Food is Arnaud and Su-Ann's love language. Photo: Filepic

“Food is our love language. Arnaud loves Chinese food, while I love all kinds of food,” says Su-Ann, who is of Chinese and Indian parentage.

Then, the pandemic hit in Mar 2020 and the first movement control order was implemented. This put a damper on things since the couple could no longer dine out at restaurants or visit places in Malaysia.

“We did manage to go to Langkawi during the recovery MCO,” says Arnaud. “There are many other places in Malaysia that we wanted to visit together, but now that state borders are closed, that’s not possible,” he says.

But the couple is comforted by the fact that they live within the same district, so they can still see each other.

Pandemic dates

“Living in the same neighbourhood does have its advantages, especially during the pandemic. So even though we couldn’t really go out on dates at restaurants or to the gym – another place that we would usually go to together, we could still see each other and find creative ways to spend time together,” says Su-Ann.

One such way is going for walks in the neighbourhood.

The couple have become creative with their dates – instead of dining out or working out at the gym together like before, they take long walks and do grocery shopping together. Photo: Unsplash/Caleb Ekeroth

While Su-Ann enjoys the high-intensity workouts and Arnaud likes working out on the gym machines, the couple now exercise by walking around the neighbourhood – often at unusual locations.

“Parks and recreational forests are also closed so we can’t go hiking. But, walking within the neighbourhood is allowed and there’s a cemetery close by so we would go for a walk around there,” says Arnaud. “I know it sounds morbid but in times like these, we have to be creative, you know,’ he adds and both of them laugh.

“We would walk my dogs there together – daily, once in the morning and once in the evening,” adds Su-Ann, who has three rescued dogs.

“Even when the gyms were reopened during the recovery MCO, we felt it wasn’t safe to go yet. We’ve been exercising just by walking around our ‘secret place’,” says Arnaud.

Food-wise, the couple have taken to dining at each other’s home instead of at restaurants because dining-in isn’t allowed during the MCOs.

“I would cook local dishes like Cantonese-style fried noodles and other stir-fries, as well as western dishes like salads, vegetable gratin and simple one-pot meals, as well as bake brownies, lemon bars, tiramisu and other desserts,” says Su-Ann.

She adds that Arnaud is good at baking too and “his specialties are quiche, tuna bread and dark chocolate cake” and both of them also have dishes that they make together such as berry clafoutis.

“So we have a lot of fun together in the kitchen,” she says.

Su-Ann and Arnaud have a lot of fun in the kitchen, cooking and baking together. Photo: Filepic

“The only thing is that we aren’t able to go out with friends for makan (eating) – an activity that we enjoy doing as a couple – during the pandemic because not only are restaurants closed, it’s also unsafe to have group events,” she says.

“But spending time with each other as a couple is still possible, and we’re grateful for that,” the couple concur.

Even a simple thing like getting the groceries can be a “dating activity” for the couple.

“I know it seems mundane, but it’s all about spending time together,” says Arnaud.

“But of course, we’re always careful, we always wear masks, sanitise and socially distance from other people whenever we go to the supermarket,” he says.

“Even when the restrictions were relaxed during the recovery MCO and we could go to places like KLCC park or Bukit Kiara park, we would make sure we were wearing masks and socially distanced from others. Basically we only interacted with each other,” he adds.

The couple is thankful that they live in the same neighbourhood so they can still see each other and spend time together during the MCOs. Photo: Filepic

But now, with the Delta variant around, I think it’s even more dangerous so we’re trying to limit going out, he says.

Su-Ann and Arnaud reveal that they have friends who haven’t seen their partners for a few months due to MCO and lockdown restrictions.

“They live in different districts – Selangor and KL – it’s so near and yet so far. Hence, they can only ‘meet’ each other on Facetime or Zoom,” says Su-Ann.

“So, while we emphatise with them, we’re also rather relieved and thankful that we live in the same area so that we can be together,” the couple concludes.