Azira and Danial with their children Ryan Iqhmal Tang and Jasmine Erina Tang during a Hari Raya Aidilfitri family photo shoot.
TWENTY-EIGHT years ago, during a job interview, Azira Mohd Ali met the man who would one day become her husband, though neither of them could have guessed it at the time.
Azira had gone for the interview at a manufacturing factory in Kampar, Perak in 1997, where she was interviewed by a Chinese male production manager.
“I remember feeling butterflies in my stomach the very first time I saw him.
“I was fortunate enough to get the job and at first, we were simply colleagues.
“Everything changed one day when a friend invited us both out for bowling,” said Azira.
From that moment on, their relationship grew. They began going out for meals and coffee and spending time together. In 2001, they got married.
After converting to Islam, her husband took the name Danial Tang Abdullah.
Danial is now 55 and has retired from the private sector, while Azira, 50, is a housewife. They live in Ipoh, Perak.
The couple has two children, a 22-year-old son who is studying at a university in Kampar, and an 18-year-old daughter who is undergoing her matriculation.
Azira proudly shares that both their children are fluent in speaking and writing Mandarin, having studied at a Chinese school.
“Danial and I are both the eldest children in our families, and we always make sure to fulfil our roles and responsibilities accordingly.
“We regularly visit each other’s families during festivals, gatherings and celebrations.
“When we attend family events at Danial’s place, his family ensures we are served halal food,” Azira said.
She added that Danial enjoyed cooking and tried preparing meals as often as possible. He has learned recipes from his mother as well as from Azira’s father.
“I can honestly say that he cooks both Chinese and Malay dishes very well,” she said.
Azira said before introducing Danial to her family, she was worried her father would not approve of their relationship.
“I was not sure how he would feel about an interfaith or mixed marriage,” she said.
However, when she finally told her father about Danial, he asked her only one question – whether she was certain Danial was the right man to be her husband.
On Danial’s side, Azira said his family simply wanted to know if, as their only son, he would be able to fulfil his responsibilities and duties to them, especially after their passing.
She added that her husband had consulted an ustaz on the matter, who reassured him that as a devoted son, he could still honour his filial responsibilities without participating in any rituals that conflict with his religious beliefs.
Blending of cultures
As for Muhammad Syafik Abdullah, who was born S. Nithiyanandan, he is thankful that his 37-year-old wife Salina Jan made it easy for him to adapt to Islam.
The 41-year-old wealth planner said as long as they followed the teachings, everything would be okay.
“When I was young, I had this perception that Islam had many restrictions.
“Since I got to know Salina, everything has changed.
“As long as we know our limits, things are not so difficult,” he said.
Salina is a housewife and a home baker and they live in Ipoh.
Muhammad Syafik and Salina with their two children Muhammad Danish and Dhiya Sophea.
“I initially thought that Muslims could not touch dogs, but learned later that we should avoid touching them when they are wet.
“If we do get into contact, we just have to perform the samak. Now, we can use special soaps specifically for the cleansing process, not necessarily with soil.
“I remember when my mother passed away, my wife said I could still pay my respects as I was her son first, and a Muslim second. I just could not perform prayers or rituals,” he added.
Muhammad Syafik first met Salina at her college in Ipoh and described it as love at first sight.
“I used to meet my friends at the college and I saw her there one day. She was also the sister of one of my friends, and we started dating in May 2013,” he said.
He said there were no issues with their respective parents when they decided to get married in 2014.
“When I asked her father for his consent to marry her, I could still remember him saying to Salina to guide me and to make sure I was comfortable (converting to Islam).
“He felt I was someone who was responsible and he accepted our marriage.
“As for my parents, they only asked me whether we can make things work due to our different cultures and religions,” he said, adding that they were also very supportive of them.
Muhammad Syafik said one of the best moments during their akad nikah (solemnisation ceremony) was seeing his cousins all decked out in baju melayu.
“Some of Salina’s relatives also wore traditional Indian clothes,” he said.
Muhammad Syafik said to marry someone from a different race, there has to be understanding and willingness to embrace one another’s culture and religion.
“If it is not acceptable, then it’s best to avoid getting into a relationship to prevent any issues later on,” he said.
“Education and respect are also important so that all of us can understand one another better and live happily together.”
The father of two children, Muhammad Danish, nine, and Dhiya Sophea, seven, said children of mixed races had different mindsets.
“My children don’t see themselves as Malay or Indian, but as Malaysians.
“My son can mix with everyone at school,” he said.
A life of perfect harmony
Master of ceremony KT Pillai, 63, sees no issues marrying a person from another race.
The seasoned emcee, whose late father was Ceylonese and mother a Chinese, said it was all about love, understanding and respect.
“In fact, I would love to see more Malaysians having mixed marriages, so we can become more muhibbah.
“It would make the world more colourful, united and tolerant,” said Pillai, who married Mimi Su, 54, in 2008 and live in Ipoh.
Pillai and Su with their sons Samuel (left) and Teivin (right).
“With more mixed couples, there can really be more understanding of each other’s cultures, traditions and values.”
Pillai said there was some initial objection from his wife’s family due to some negative experiences at her home village in Langkawi.
“They thought she would have a hard time with me and that I would hurt her.
“I did not give up and continued pursuing her. What was important is that she trusted me,” he said, adding that Su was his second marriage.
“As time went by and I got closer to them, they accepted and welcomed me.”
Apart from him, Pillai, who is the second of six siblings, said two of his younger brothers married Malay women.
“We live in perfect harmony. When it comes to family gatherings, we will have halal food,” he said, adding that he has two sons – Teivin, 28, from his previous marriage and Samuel, 26, from Su’s previous marriage.
“My mother, who is now 90 years old, is happy to see the family so close-knit.”
Pillai said being in a relationship with someone from another race has also helped his career.
“I get to see and learn more things from a wider spectrum and perspective,” he added.
