StarLifestyle asks Malaysians what they think about the topic of male-female friendships.
Yes, men and women can be friends. It’s not about whether they are male or female – there has to be some sort of “chemistry” in order for two people to be friends. If two people don’t get along or if their personalities aren’t compatible, they wouldn’t even be friends – whether they are male or female.
Usually, there isn’t a problem between the two who are friends. The problem is with all the other busybodies around them and their ideas of what should or shouldn’t be. So I would say, yes, it’s possible for men and women to be friends. But beware of those around you because meddlesome people tend to destroy beautiful things including real friendships.
Yes, I’ve many guy friends, in fact, most of my friends are guys. Of course, after I got married, there are fewer – that’s more out of respect for my husband than anything. I’m still friends with these guys but I don’t hang out with them like I used to when I was single because it might cause some raised eyebrows.
Often such friendships start because of common activities. For example, you might like a particular sport but your spouse/partner doesn’t. So you end up hanging out out with other likeminded people, some who will be the opposite sex. So yes, I would say, it’s possible to be friends with the opposite sex.
There’s nothing wrong with male-female friendships as long as both of you know where you stand. If one party is interested in something more but the other isn’t, then because of unmet/different expectations, it might be difficult. But if both understand that it’s just a platonic friendship, then there’s no harm in it.
A male-female friendship might enrich one’s life because they bring a different perspective to things. A person who has friends of the opposite sex will tend to be more balanced, being able to see things from both perspectives.
In a relationship
I do have guy friends but most of them are much younger than me. It’s easier to be friends with younger guys because there isn’t any expectations that might lead to problems later. Also, it might be difficult to be friends with older guys because they’re likely to be married and their wives may not like them being close to other girls. Older, single guys may have certain expectations and might be disappointed if you don’t feel the same way.
People might look at a guy and girl who are friends with each other and try to put them together as a couple, and that can spoil the friendship by making it awkward. Or, if they’re the narrow-minded type, they might disapprove. But you’ve to know where you both stand, and if you’ve already communicated about it, then what’s there to prevent you from being friends?
I think men and women can be friends. Often when you’re attached, you might befriend other couples, or even hang out or double date with your friends and their spouses. But it’s not the kind of friendship where you hang out with the opposite sex friend alone for prolonged periods of time. Not because it might cause misunderstandings but because when you’re married or attached, you’ll have more commitments and less time.
If there is attraction between the two friends then it’s a problem if both or either of them is attached. But if they’re both single, then well. they might end up in a relationship.