For some women, a memoon trip is all about challenging oneself and experiencing something completely wild. — Photos: Pixabay
Wind in your hair, a beverage in one hand and a wide smile on your face as you lounge leisurely by the sparkling turquoise waters.
This is probably your dream scenario while on your travels, or something similarly relaxing if blue water isn’t your thing.
You may have a spa session lined up next, and in the evening, it is time for a fancy dinner – for one.
The above itinerary is just an example of how you can do a “memoon”. You can tailor it to your liking, based on your own expression of self-care.
It is your solo honeymoon after all.
Women embarking on solo travels is nothing new as it has been done for decades, though on a smaller scale prior to the age of blogging, and subsequently, social media posting, both of which popularised (and, to some degree, romanticised) the idea of travelling alone.
The freedom and independence that solo travelling brings are whole-heartedly embraced by women, especially those tethered to multiple responsibilities in their typical day-to-day.
After all, deciding only for yourself and not others, without interference from anyone else, is a welcome change.
Brittany Allyn, 39, from the United States, agrees with this concept – and more.
The full-time lifestyle, women’s empowerment and travel content creator doesn’t just go on solo travels, she ups the ante by transforming her solivagant wanderings into self-pampering memoons.
Allyn is working on trademarking the term ‘memoon’. — BRITTANY ALLYN
Solo yolo
You might be wondering, “but what is a memoon?”.
You’ve probably never encountered the term before, yet here you are having read it three times up to this point in this article.
Here’s how Allyn, who introduced and popularised the term just a couple of years ago, defines it: “A memoon is when you take your dream solo honeymoon without waiting for a relationship or a reason.”
Allyn’s self-love travel tale started in the summer of 2022, when she was living in London (she’s currently based in New York). An affordably priced ticket to Venice, Italy was what gave her a “wake up call”.
“I’ve always wanted to go to Venice with a partner, as I thought it was just too romantic to go solo,” she said.
It was this moment that made her realise she really shouldn’t be wasting time waiting for her “Mr Right” before visiting a place that she has been wanting to go her whole life.
Yolo (you only live once), so why not just go solo, she figured.
“So, I went, and I documented the whole weekend,” Allyn shared, calling it “one of the most magical trips of my entire life”.
She also discovered on the trip that dining alone really wasn’t so bad. “No one’s really paying attention to you once you sit down, as everyone’s focused on their own table.”
Dining out by yourself is one of the most difficult, yet very liberating, things to do while on a solo trip.
Allyn also explained how the memoon trend differs from the usual solo travelling.
“The purpose is to really indulge in yourself the entire trip,” she said.
“Do every single thing that brings you joy from the moment you wake up – go for a beautiful walk on your own time, order breakfast in bed, or shop for five hours if you want to.”
It’s about “being selfish” and having a whole trip with “exactly everything that you want and want to do”.
A memoon is also “very much a reflecting type of trip”, Allyn added, saying that another point to it is to “really reflect on your life, take a pause and think about where you’re at and your goals”.
“It has let me really align with what kind of person I want to be and what I want my future to look like,” she said.
Love yourself, your way
Memoon is not a term that Raja Ummi Nadrah Raja Sulaiman, 35, is familiar with.
But unbeknown to her, she has actually been practising it.
“I have never heard of the term before, but it perfectly describes what my solo trips are about – they are love letters to myself, or a rendezvous with myself, if you like,” the Klang-based Malaysian traveller said.
“There’s something incredibly powerful and liberating about not having to wait for permission to live fully,” Ummi Nadrah said.
The catalyst for her memoons was a breakup at age 21. Like many others going through a broken heart, Ummi Nadrah was “desperately trying to prove to myself that I was worth more than what I was led to believe”.
The very first solo trip she took was to Singapore. “I was not privileged enough to travel anywhere as a child, so this was a big deal,” she said. “Since then, I have travelled to over 60 countries, mostly on my own.”
Ummi Nadrah takes a different route, however, when it comes to the way she expresses love for herself, focusing on self-empowerment and growth.
So, instead of pampering herself, she pushes herself out of her comfort zone to experience new things.
“I have climbed mountains and volcanoes, jumped out of air planes, spent a night in a ‘haunted’ former prison, meditated with monks, learnt how to do Thai massage and got certified for it, walked 240km from Portugal to Spain ... you get the idea,” she said nonchalantly, listing the many unconventional ways she’s spent her memoons.
Chin loves enriching her historical knowledge on her travels. — H.L. CHIN
Fellow Malaysian traveller, H.L. Chin, 42, has a similar approach to her memoons.
Chin, who works in investment banking, began travelling on her own when her usual travel companion was unable to join her for a trip she had really wanted to go on.
Instead of rescheduling and waiting until another opportunity arose, Chin decided to just go solo. Since then, she has travelled to several places by herself.
She named Kuching in Sarawak, Busan (South Korea) and Kaohsiung (Taiwan) as some of the places she has travelled to on her own. Her latest trip was to Nanjing, China.
“I usually visit museums, historical sites, local markets and national parks,” she shared, adding that she would take public transport or walk to get around. “When I get tired, I relax at a park or cafe, watching the world go by. This is my way of understanding history and local culture.”
For Chin, her memoons involve self-enrichment. She would soak in the historical and cultural aspects of her chosen destination, and doing everything at her own pace. This allows her to focus on just herself and learn all the things she’s interested in without having to worry about anyone hurrying her along.
Malaysia was Rupal’s latest solo travel destination. — RUPAL KHANDELWAL
Meanwhile, Rupal Khandelwal from India expressed her happiness at finally being able to travel by herself to Malaysia, a country she has been wanting to visit for a long time.
“I visited Batu Caves, the (PETRONAS) Twin Towers, and everything in between. I joined a day tour to make the most of it,” Rupal, 42, said.
“I have been travelling a lot,” she continued. “But lately I realised I needed even more out of these travels.
“I was seeking complete freedom, and time to just be with myself. Travelling with friends and family provides you with joy, but solo travel provides you with contentment.”
Working as an entrepreneur and realtor based in California in the US, Rupal still finds time to travel around her home country, India, every four to five months. She loves travelling solo as she gets to explore her culture and heritage.
Now that Malaysia has been crossed off her list, her next target is either Sri Lanka or Cambodia.
Her solo travels are often retrospective; Rupal indulges in her own company and takes the time to process her thoughts and feelings.
Life lived, lessons learned
Rupal’s memoons have taught her to take things easy and go with the flow. She said that she has learned to be more careful, observant, and to also be more “in the moment”.
She’s learned to stop whenever she likes when out and about and just “let it all sink in”.
“Keep no agenda, and live in the moment,” she advised. “Feel the life around you and let everything flow on its own.”
Chin echoed this sentiment: “Just go with the flow. Plans change, and it is okay to switch plans mid-way.”
Travelling by herself has taught her a lot about flexibility, too, and about being “thick-skinned”, so to speak.
Chin’s introverted nature tends to inhibit her from approaching strangers, but having had to do exactly that when she needed directions or recommendations during her travels has greatly helped in building her confidence and self-assurance.
Ummi Nadrah describes her memoons as a rendezvous with herself. — RAJA UMMI NADRAH RAJA SULAIMAN
As for Ummi Nadrah, she said, “It has taught me that I am strong and capable. That I am enough. Life’s too short to wait for the right company.
“Imagine a travel series where you’re the main character, writer, and director. Curate it the way you like it. Don’t let other people ‘travel-shame’ you just because it doesn’t fit into their idea of the perfect trip.
“As long as you’re not harming yourself or others, you do you.”
Memoons may not be an entirely new concept, but there was no one word that truly encapsulated the meaning and purpose of this style of solo travelling among women until Allyn coined the term.
She said that she is now working on trademarking “memoon”, seeing that it has gained such widespread fame that it’s appeared not just on social media but also in travel trend reports.
“I have a lot of documentation that shows that I have come up with it, as well as a lot of press,” she said, adding that she is now working with lawyers on this matter and noting that it “usually takes about a year to trademark something”.
After the memoon movement started gaining traction on social media, the message of self-empowerment and independence behind it resonated with quite a number of women that Allyn began receiving thousands of messages.
“I’ve probably gotten around 10,000 messages from women all over the world, saying that it’s made them feel more empowered,” she shared. “It’s really cool to know that I inspired them to have one of the best memories that they’ll have in their entire life.”
While other women are getting inspired by Allyn to do the things they’ve been wanting to do, she herself finds inspiration from someone close to her: her “Aunt Pamela”.
“My Aunt Pamela is one of my role models,” she said of the aunt whom she has been close to since she was born. She describes Pamela as an adult figure who lives a very full life, who showed her “what that might look like without a family or children”.
“It wasn’t any less sad or any happier, it was just different. It was more unique probably to grow up with such a strong figure like that, and it’s really shaped the world that I wanted to make for myself,” Allyn said.
Unfortunately, even in this day and age, when International Women’s Day – which is observed on March 8 every year – celebrates the social, economic, cultural, and political achievements of women, there still exist those who insist on tearing each other down instead of being supportive.
Case in point, the comments left on Allyn’s social media pages by users who deem her posts “feminist” (they perceive the term as having negative connotations).
These commentors question why she does not find a partner to settle down with instead of travelling on her own, or insist that she will regret being “an independent woman” and not having a family of her own. Some even accuse her of having a bad attitude since no man is “willing” to be with her.
Unfazed by these negative comments, Allyn remarked, “I don’t worry about the negative comments and I just send them good vibes.
“I think that learning how to enjoy time with yourself is one of the strongest skillsets you can learn as a person. It leads to true inner peace and happiness, so I just wish them more happiness overall.”
This positive outlook is one that Ummi Nadrah shares as well, who advises everyone to not “be afraid or embarrassed of being ‘alone’. You’ve got yourself, and that’s one of the best companions you’ll ever have.”
