For decades, boarding schools in Malaysia have been regarded as elite institutions that symbolise academic excellence, social mobility and national aspiration.
Parents, particularly from rural or lower-income backgrounds, often saw them as a gateway for their children to access quality education, structured discipline and the social networks that could shape future leaders.
Indeed, many of Malaysia’s political leaders, top civil servants and professionals are proud products of these schools.
Boarding schools remain an important part of the national education landscape and continue to attract applicants each year.
Yet, recent reports of bullying in these institutions, some leading to severe injury and even death, have caused deep concern.
For many parents, what was once a source of pride has now become a source of worry.
Social media has amplified this anxiety, with stories of violence and humiliation shared widely.
The perception has emerged that bullying is not just an occasional problem, but rather, an issue that is increasingly common in boarding schools.
To address this crisis, we must critically examine how these schools operate, what psychological dynamics play out in their unique environments, and how unresolved trauma can affect students long into adulthood.
Historical and cultural context
The boarding school model in Malaysia has roots in the colonial era.
From the beginning of the 20th century, these institutions were created and designed to produce an educated elite to serve in the colonial administration.
Discipline, hierarchy and conformity were embedded in their structures.
Over time, this system expanded to include various specialised schools aimed at nurturing high-achieving students from across the country.
Boarding schools quickly became aspirational.
They offered academic rigour, extracurricular opportunities, and in some cases, prestige.
Yet, their residential nature also created self-contained communities with their own traditions, rituals and power dynamics.
Seniority is often a defining feature.
Older students often have the authority, either formal or informal, to “discipline” juniors, a practice sometimes defended as character-building.
Unfortunately, this practice can blur into intimidation, harassment and outright bullying.
The psychological environment
Boarding schools are not ordinary schools.
Students live, study, eat and sleep in the same compound for months at a time.
This immersion creates a powerful sense of belonging.
Unfortunately, this also magnifies power imbalances.
From a psychological perspective, the intrinsic features of boarding schools have the potential to create conditions where bullying can thrive.
Adolescents are acutely sensitive to status and dominance.
In boarding schools, like day schools, certain students, like prefects, are granted formal authority over others.
Senior students are also often deemed to have informal authority over juniors.
While intended to foster leadership, this dynamic can potentially result in misuse of power, where juniors may be forced to endure embarassing rituals under the guise of discipline.
Adolescents seek acceptance from peers.
In the confined environment of a dormitory, standing out can make one a target.
Many students therefore remain silent, or even participate in bullying, to protect their own status within the group, in conformity to pressure and group identity.
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Living communally means there is little personal space.
Conflicts, insecurities or frustrations may be displaced onto weaker peers.
For vulnerable students, the lack of a safe personal environment can heighten feelings of helplessness and fear.
A pervasive cultural narrative insists that enduring hardship makes one stronger.
A common excuse given for bullying is that it builds resilience in the bullied.
Psychological evidence, however, shows the opposite.
Humiliation and violence do not build resilience.
They foster anxiety, depression and a cycle of aggression.
This romanticisation of toughness has no place in today’s world.
Psychology of the bully
Bullies are not born. They are shaped by environment, culture and unmet psychological needs.
That is why only some students become perpetrators.
Adolescence is a period of insecurity.
By exerting dominance over others, bullies temporarily mask their own vulnerability.
Many bullies were once victims themselves.
The cycle of victim-turned-perpetrator is common in hierarchical environments like boarding schools, where juniors endure mistreatment and later “take revenge” when they become seniors.
This is called modelled behaviour.
In cultures where bullying is normalised, aggressive behaviour is not seen as morally wrong, but as tradition.
Over time, students internalise the belief that cruelty is acceptable and become desensitised to aggression.
Students who struggle with self-esteem, family neglect or unresolved anger may channel their frustrations into bullying.
By projecting their inner turmoil onto weaker peers, they are subconsciously trying to deal with their own unaddressed emotional needs.
Psychology of the bullied
For the victims, the experience of bullying is deeply traumatic.
The psychological toll can be significant.
Victims often live in a constant state of anxiety and hypervigilance, anticipating the next attack or humiliation.
Adolescents are especially vulnerable to internalising mistreatment, believing they somehow deserve it, resulting in shame and self-blame.
When victims feel powerless to stop the bullying, they may withdraw, becoming passive or apathetic, which further erodes their confidence.
This is called learned helplessness.
Victims of chronic bullying face increased risks of depression, anxiety disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and suicidal thoughts.
Long-term impact
The scars of boarding school bullying can last well into adulthood.
Research on “boarding school syndrome” in other countries shows how institutionalised bullying and separation from family can create enduring psychological wounds.
In Malaysia, anecdotal evidence and clinical practice echo similar patterns.
Adults who were bullied may struggle with self-worth and assertiveness in relationships and workplaces.
Having experienced arbitrary or abusive power, survivors may carry a lifelong distrust of authority.
The inability to trust peers or fear of intimacy can result from formative years spent in hostile peer environments, leading to significant interpersonal challenges.
Some victims, in attempting to toughen their own children, may unwittingly replicate harsh practices, thus perpetuating cycles of trauma and further consolidating generational transmission of aggression.
Survivors are more prone to depression, substance use, alcohol abuse and unresolved anger.
For some, unresolved trauma resurfaces during stressful life events, requiring therapeutic intervention years later.
Breaking the cycle
If Malaysia is to preserve the many positive aspects of its boarding schools, the culture of bullying must be confronted head-on.
This requires systemic, not cosmetic change.
Clear anti-bullying policies must be enforced consistently.
Disciplinary processes should be transparent, with students, parents and staff fully informed of consequences.
Zero tolerance towards bullying should be the central philosophy of the boarding school if public confidence in the system is to be restored.
Boarding schools should employ trained counsellors and mental health professionals.
Safe, confidential psychological support systems for students to seek help must be available.
Serious efforts must be made to redefine seniority and leadership.
Instead of using fear-based authority, schools should promote positive leadership models.
Peer mentorship programmes, restorative practices and leadership training can replace hazing rituals.
Parental engagement is crucial as parents often feel cut off once their children enter boarding schools.
Regular communication and parent-school partnerships can reduce this gap and ensure families remain active in their children’s lives.
Cultural shift
The broader narrative that bullying builds resilience must be challenged.
True resilience is developed through supportive environments, not cycles of humiliation.
Malaysia’s boarding schools have played, and continue to play, a vital role in nurturing talent and shaping the nation’s future leaders.
But any form of bullying, which may have been tolerated or brushed aside as “tradition”, threatens to undermine this proud legacy.
The psychological evidence is clear.
Bullying damages both the bully and the bullied, leaving long-lasting scars that reach far beyond adolescence.
To rebuild trust, boarding schools must evolve.
They must create environments where discipline is grounded in respect, where leadership is built on empathy, and where resilience comes from support rather than suffering.
Only then can parents send their children to boarding schools with confidence that they will return not only as accomplished students, but also as emotionally healthy, compassionate adults.
Bullying must never again be mistaken for discipline, nor cruelty for character-building.
For the sake of our children and the future of our nation, it is time to break the silence and end this culture of harm once and for all.
Datuk Dr Andrew Mohanraj is a consultant psychiatrist and the Malaysian Mental Health Association president. For more information, email starhealth@thestar.com.my. The information provided is for educational and communication purposes only, and it should not be construed as personal medical advice. The Star does not give any warranty on accuracy, completeness, functionality, usefulness or other assurances as to the content appearing in this column. The Star disclaims all responsibility for any losses, damage to property or personal injury suffered directly or indirectly from reliance on such information.
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