Smart phones, dumb manners

THIS week, I feel compelled to write about something I find very disturbing: how we use our smart phones. I have discovered that though our phones are extremely smart, apparently, we, the users, are not.

Now, I am not referring to the technological know-how of using the phone, but the simple question of when it is appropriate to use the phone in a public setting, meaning with other people present.

It could be a meeting room setting, a classroom setting, a home visit setting, or a very solemn lecture setting. I have seen what I consider gross misuse of the phone, tantamount to either rude, unprofessional conduct or just plain stupidity.

Why all the fuss, you ask?

Well, as human beings, we are supposed to be “cultured”, right?

But here is the thing: I think it is highly probable that neither our parents nor our teachers ever taught us the “when” of using the phone appropriately.

I have seen children, professionals, university students, academics, deans, and “important people” too, not know how to do this.

We, as human beings, should understand human-to-human nonverbal communication, values, and norms. That is part of what being human means to me, at least.

The premise here is that we are in the company of others; we must show respect to them because we require them to show respect to us.

Once, to illustrate a sad point, I was at a university event, an important lecture. While the guest lecturer was speaking, I happened to glance left and noticed something that prompted me to look right and steal a look behind me too. There were many people holding their smartphones and either reading or, worse, texting!

Now, I understand that when a royal personage gives a speech, an announcer usually asks everyone to turn off their phones completely before he even walks in. But that doesn’t usually happen in other settings.

As an academic, I give many lectures in class and in public. I have noticed that, unless I am talking about a sensitive political issue, a large number of the people in the audience will be focused on their phones.

I have seen an audience comprising academics and students alike distracted by their phones throughout the whole talk.

When I am on a panel and sitting in front facing the audience I note this too. When I am not talking, while the other panellists are speaking and I’m listening, I also take a quick look at the audience for reactions, interest, and boredom. But half the time nowadays I can’t tell because so many are focused on their phones.

How can we show respect to others when we do not face them politely? How could we expect any sense of respect or dignity from others towards us if we bury our faces in our phones?

When I walk into a lecture room full of the new intake, the following is my standard speech to architecture students:

“Good morning, students. My name is Dr Mohd Tajuddin. I am Professor of Architecture Theory, and today I will be talking about ‘Democracy and Its Expressions in Architecture’.

“Now, before I begin, I would like to kindly ask you to pay close attention to my talk, as it is not something that you will ever find on the Internet using AI. As students you are learning so please pay attention, and as future professional architects you need to also understand the etiquette of professionalism.

“So if you need to text someone, please leave the classroom quietly, do so, and then return quietly. Texting while I am giving a lecture is rude to me and also unprofessional conduct. If you text while attending a client’s meeting, your firm would probably lose the project because of you. I am sure you will then also lose your job at the firm.”

After this reminder, I would then proceed to give the lecture. Lo and behold, usually at least three students will be texting barely 10 minutes in. When that happens, I approach each student and politely ask if he or she needs to leave the room to attend to a more urgent matter.

This culture has got completely out of hand. It’s OK with me if you take out the phone for five seconds to glance at an important message and, if it’s urgent, even to ask permission to reply.

But make sure it isn’t done more than twice. And never, never do so in front of a client or potential client. Never.

In the English language, there is a modern phrase, “In your face”, which is usually used in anger or in a rowdy manner. Well, having your phone in front of your face while someone else is speaking seems to me may communicate almost the same feeling.

Of course, the person doing so may just be oblivious and is not intending to be rude. But the damage is done, nevertheless.

I believe a kind of campaign and educational instruction in schools and in universities is in order.

Unless we take action, the young who are already texting in front of their parents at dinner tables will just get worse when they grow up.

As for me, well if you text while you’re supposed to be listening to someone speak, all I can say is “In your face!”

Prof Dr Mohd Tajuddin Mohd Rasdi is Professor of Architecture at the Tan Sri Omar Centre for Science, Technology and Innovation Policy Studies at UCSI University. The views expressed here are entirely the writer’s own.