Respect can build nations

WE all know the word “respect”, we’ve used it countless times in our lives. We no doubt use it in situations involving our elders and those in positions of authority like our teachers and leaders.

We learn to practise respect by way of our words when we address our family members and show its use in professional decorum in how we address those outside our family.

We also act out signs of respect, like giving up a seat on a crowded bus or train for someone who needs it more, holding out hands to shake or giving a slight bow to show our relationship to someone senior in hierarchy, perhaps. At the very least, our respect for others is shown with our smiles or even our silence.

Respect is simply a form of social communication to achieve a smooth flow of events and actions in situations deemed formal and semi-formal.

But for me, after 63 years of learning and reflection, I believe respect is one of the keys to nation-building and even lasting world peace.

For me, respect for the other is the highest form of spirituality in a human life.

When I read social media comments or criticisms of our leaders, or politicians, or even just someone with a different opinion that show absolutely no respect – that are downright rude – it makes me wonder.

It always comes across as if these critics are perfect while those they criticise are wrought with flaws.

I used to wonder how anyone can have such an attitude – to think themselves perfect, or to think they have complete and perfect knowledge about the issue they are addressing.

I’ve come to the conclusion that our religious education and a lack of knowledge of history and how to have rational political discussions are the reasons so many of us show so much disrespect.

But why must we respect others, one might ask? If we can dwell on this simple question, we can find a mountain of spiritual lessons that would make us better human beings.

First of all, why should we not respect others in the biological sense? After all, our blood was created by God to be similar and directly transferable among what we define as different races, religions, political identities and cultures.

When I was in hospital suffering from loss of blood from a bleeding stomach, four packs of blood were transfused into me.

I jokingly asked the doctor whether the blood came from Malays, Chinese, Indians and non-Muslims.

He replied carefully that he did not know as the blood was only marked as A+, O, B- and such.

When I was being prepped for a heart bypass on another occasion, my doctor asked me to find six blood donors, and when I put the word out, all the donors that turned up were young Chinese people, friends of my UCSI University architecture students. (For those who are interested, I didn’t actually undergo a bypass as three stents were enough to save my heart.)

So how can we not respect others when those from another culture, faith, race and of a different political persuasion could be those who might save our lives?

Secondly, we should respect those who could offer us a living by way of employment.

When I reached optional retirement age at Universiti Teknologi Malaysia, I applied to several public universities to try to continue my work.

Although my credentials were excellent, the universities rejected me – I believe it was due to my writing over the years that criticised members of my race and adherents of my religion who visited injustice on those not of the same race and religion with their words and attitudes.

It was the non-Malay owner of a private university who took me in because he believed in my work to help this nation rebuild itself from the toxic narratives created by 40 years of political mishandling.

Without this chance, my career as a professor and as a contributor to the nation might have ended 10 years ago.

So why would we find great difficulty in respecting others outside our own race and faith when our employment or our children’s employment and future could lie with them?

Thirdly, we should respect others for knowledge and experience that we do not possess.

Many people disrespect others because they think their knowledge of their own religions are enough and that they need no other.

Then there are those who disrespect others in different professions or levels of administration by criticising what they themselves have never had any experience with nor gone through.

We criticise mercilessly because we care about something but that is not an excuse to arrogantly assume that we know all there is to know about being in the position of the other.

Yes, we should complain and criticise when necessary but we must know that we do not have the experience of the other and so we must show some respect in our wording and phrasing of the complaints and concerns.

Finally, we must reflect whether God will accept our deeds as adequate for our rewards in the hereafter. Which of our deeds would God accept, the ones where we help our own kind only or the ones where we aid everyone, even others not of our kind?

If we think we are always in God’s favour regardless of whether we respect those different from us or not, then I believe we are truly lost indeed.

Thus, respecting others for biological, economic, knowledge, and morality are the anchors of a great spiritual growth in any faith.

For if we think we are the only ones right and good, it is a sign that we are not so, for we must truly depend on others for our salvation, always.

That is the true key to respect that can build communities, nations and peace on earth.

Prof Dr Mohd Tajuddin Mohd Rasdi is Professor of Architecture at the Tan Sri Omar Centre for Science, Technology and Innovation Policy Studies at UCSI University. The views expressed here are entirely the writer’s own.