Over a decade ago, when I was a schoolteacher, I remember how those who were near retirement would often talk about all the things they planned to do once they were no longer occupied with their full-time jobs.
Travel was always a popular topic that would lead to much excitement and the younger ones would often respond with envy, “Lucky you, I still have 15 more years to go. Can’t wait for retirement. Maybe I will opt out.”
Photo 123rf.comUnderlying the anticipation of being “free”, however, were questions of how it would actually feel when you are standing in front of the class for the last time, or having luke-warm tea with substandard curry puffs in the school canteen while listening to juicy gossip about your principal.
While there are parts of school life that you will be more than happy to leave behind and certain students who you will be glad not to ever teach again, there will be a twinge of pain when that last day comes, knowing that things will never be the same again.
While some went on to fulfil another calling or embark on a hobby they have been putting off due to teaching commitments, others could not imagine doing anything else having secured positions in tuition centres and education institutions.
“Retire from teaching? Never.
“I’m just changing environment, not retiring completely,” said Mr Lal, who had already accepted a position as senior science teacher in a private school in the district.
Another quipped, “I can’t imagine life without teaching. I’ll probably do it as long as I as I am able to or as long as I am still needed.”
There was a brief silence.
“How do we know whether we are still needed?
“The way the curriculum and teaching methods are changing, the need to be artificial intelligence (AI)-literate, I am beginning to wonder whether one day even the younger teachers will still be needed, let alone us retired ones.
“Will students even want to be taught by us senior teachers who when compared to our younger colleagues, may come across as not being as energetic, or as tech-savvy?” someone finally said.
Having said that, many parents have expressed a preference for senior educators to teach their children because they have all these years of experience and knowledge.
As much as you have proclaimed a thousand times that you “just can’t wait to leave” and gritted your teeth at all the students who have never paid attention in your class, at the principal who made your life miserable, at the promotions that passed you by, and the education policies that promised to enhance education standards but only ended up lowering benchmarks; you can’t silence that inner voice that tells you wistfully you will never again walk through those school gates.
Sure, you will get invited back for dinners, events or perhaps just to catch up with some of your friends who are still there, but you are no longer part of that circle. Perhaps you will fall into another circle, one where you can finally pursue and even realise those other things you said you never had time for. The baking, the sewing, the travelling, the business opportunities, continuing your academic pursuits, or just being at home and enjoying the luxury of waking up late and having the whole day to do as you please.
But whatever else you do with your life, the truth is you will miss your school teaching days. Memories of instances that made all those years worth it will rise unbidden and unexpectedly. The face of that one student in the last class who comes up to you and says, “Cikgu, sekarang saya boleh faham macam mana selesaikan persamaan” (Teacher, now I understand how to solve equations) or the beaming cashier at the supermarket counter who greets you, his former teacher, with that familiar “Hi Cikgu” years later, are moments when you realise that despite everything, the teaching journey was worth your while.
Dr G. Mallika Vasugi, who currently teaches at a local university, provides insights into the teaching profession. The views expressed here are the writer’s own.
