Showing care: Counsellors deal with emotional burden and building trust. – 123rf.com
Passion, empathy and compassion among crucial values in helping others achieve mental well-being
THE need for counsellors is increasingly apparent in a post-Covid-19 world where individuals must learn to cope with a myriad of new challenges.
Counsellors have an important role to play in listening to clients, and helping them adjust to and deal with whatever changes they must make.
Although I never thought I’d one day end up as a counsellor educator, I have always loved conversations and soon realised that I am a good listener and am passionate about helping others.
My 30 years as a lecturer and counsellor have made me realise just how vital mental health and well-being are, and what a rewarding career this has been.
Our duties as counsellors are to support and empower clients to become more productive and be able to adjust to new demands and environments.
In our roles, we deal with emotional burden and building trust.
With care, clients will become more comfortable with revealing and exploring their issues and personal concerns with us because they know that it will be kept in confidence.
Being there for them and being in tune with the clients’ needs means giving them our full attention.
We cannot be distracted if we are to make them feel important and supported.
This is crucial in building a therapeutic relationship between a counsellor and a client.
Knowledge of human behaviour is also important in understanding clients.
This will enable the counsellors to inform clients about what is a normal part of their distinct developmental characteristics or issues, and when they will need assistance and diagnosis from a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist.
Qualities needed
In the client-centred, or person-centred approach, there are three core conditions which are important for counsellors – empathic understanding, genuineness, and unconditional positive regard.
These are not skills but rather personal attributes that would make the clients feel safe enough to access their own potential.
Empathic understanding fosters a positive and conducive relationship between the counsellor and the client, enabling the former to put himself or herself in the other person’s shoes.
Being genuine means being open and honest in communication. It is also about having the willingness to show vulnerability to the clients.
Unconditional positive regard is about providing an environment where clients are free to experience whatever thoughts and feelings they have without the fear of being judged.
Counselling is a challenging journey so one must be passionate, caring, empathetic and compassionate to be of real help to one’s clients.
Self-reflection allows you to search for your identity and true self so that you can help others.
In my early years, I found that I had the interest and ability to listen and empathise with others who were going through struggles and sufferings in their lives.
Being an active listener will help in healing and easing the clients’ emotional suffering, after which both the counsellors and the clients can discuss the most suitable coping strategies together.
Counselling as a profession can sometimes be exhausting and overwhelming because of the time and devotion you put into listening to others.
A counsellor’s job is not about being judgmental or giving advice about a client’s behaviour or feeling.
Rather, it is about communication and “talk therapy”.
The objective is to help clients gain self-understanding and self-acceptance, and be able to see their issues and concerns more clearly.
To become an effective counsellor, one needs to be resilient, patient and non-judgmental.
It is also important to respect confidentiality, as well as professional boundaries.
Clients must know that when making their own decisions, it cannot be influenced by their counsellors’ views, and they should be responsible for whatever actions they will take in the future.
Dr Zainah Ahmad Zamani is an associate professor at Taylor’s University School of Liberal Arts and Sciences. She is the director for the Master of Counselling programme. The varsity recently launched its Impact Lab, which aims to promote mental health through policies, best practices and systems for human flourishing and optimal functioning. The views expressed here are the writer’s own.
