Finding your ikigai: A journey of meaning and self-discovery

Valued experiences, authentic connections, and writing our own life story can help us find a deeper sense of meaning and purpose in life. — 123rf

In the busyness of our modern world, the search for meaning in life can feel like an elusive quest. What really makes life worth getting out of bed in the morning?

I was happy to come across a recent article by my friend and writing partner, Dr Eugene Tee, shedding some light on the question that we all ask ourselves at times. Last year, Eugene obtained his master’s degree in applied positive psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, studying under the “father” of positive psychology, Prof Martin Seligman. Writing for the program's online MAPP Magazine, his article, "The Life Well Lived is a Life Worth Experiencing", explores the Japanese concept of "ikigai", offering a refreshing perspective on cultivating a life well-lived.

At its core, ikigai is about engaging in meaningful experiences and activities that bring a sense of purpose and fulfilment. It is a concept deeply rooted in Japanese culture, shaped by the country's unique history and customs. While ikigai shares some similarities with Western notions of meaning and purpose, it also has its own distinct nuances and cultural context.

One of the key components of ikigai is "keiken" or engaging in personally valued experiences. As Eugene explains, “These experiences needn't always be positive or pleasant; they can be effortful, stimulating, or comforting. What is important is that people willingly choose to engage in the experiences they value, and they do so in the spirit of spontaneity.” This idea resonates with the concept of a psychologically rich life, characterised by a variety of interesting and perspective-changing experiences.

Another important aspect of ikigai is "ibasho", which refers to the interpersonal relationships where people feel authentic, valued, and cared for. Eugene emphasises that “having close, valued relationships in which to share and experience one's life journey adds a sense of fulfilment and meaning to one's life.” This relational aspect of ikigai highlights the importance of authenticity and openness in our connections with others, allowing us to express our true selves and feel a genuine sense of belongingness.

The third component of ikigai is "houkousei", or life directionality. This involves seeing our past, present, and future as being meaningfully connected rather than a series of random experiences. When we take a step back and think about how our past has made us who we are today, and how what we're doing now is helping us get to where we want to be, it's like we're piecing together our own unique life story. And that story, with all its twists and turns, is what gives our lives meaning and keeps us moving forward with purpose.

To help us cultivate our own sense of ikigai, Eugene offers a practical exercise involving reflection on cherished photos. This simple yet powerful practice can help us craft a connected and personally significant life story. When we pick out photos that capture moments that really matter to us and take a moment to think about why they’re so special, we’re getting a glimpse into what truly matters – the experiences we cherish, genuine connections we have with others, and where our life might be headed.

Albert Camus, the French existential philosopher, believed the only question that truly mattered was whether life is worth living. Despite the absurdity and struggles of existence, Camus concluded that life is worth embracing, and it’s our job to create the meaning of our life rather than wait to discover it. As someone who thinks a lot about what makes life worth living, I find Eugene's work to be a valuable contribution to the ongoing conversation about finding meaning and purpose in life.

In sharing the concept of ikigai and its three key components – keiken, ibasho, and houkousei – Eugene provides a framework for cultivating an interesting approach to a life well-lived. While ikigai is rooted in Japanese culture, its principles are universally applicable and can be adapted to suit individual circumstances and cultural contexts.

In our world that often prioritises external markers of success, ikigai reminds us to turn inward and focus on the experiences and relationships that are important to us. By engaging in personally valued experiences, nurturing authentic connections, and being the author of our own story, we can find a deeper sense of meaning and purpose that transcends the superficial trappings of modern life.

It's an enjoyable pursuit to explore the wisdom of ikigai and start uncovering our personal recipe for a fulfilling existence. Putting the concepts of keiken, ibasho, and houkousei into practice, we can craft an engaging life filled with significance, genuine relationships, and direction – a life we can look back on with pride and contentment.

The journey to a life well-lived starts with a single step, so why not take that step today? Embrace more of what makes you feel alive, cherish the connections that make you feel loved, and trust in the story that you're writing with every passing moment. In doing so, you'll discover that the meaning of life is not something to be found, but rather something to be created – one meaningful experience at a time.

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Sunny Side Up columnist Sandy Clarke has long held an interest in emotions, mental health, mindfulness and meditation. He believes the more we understand ourselves and each other, the better societies we can create. If you have any questions or comments, email [e-mail]. The views expressed here are entirely the writer's own.