Ghosts, nah, they're not scary – the cost of preschools, now that's scary

The ham-headed extraterrestrial – shown here in a scene from 'ET: The Extraterrestrial' with a (very) young Drew Barrymore – might have scared a child but it can't compare now with the thought that you have a kid to feed. — Screen capture/Universal City Studios

When I was a kid I was scared of ET.

I’m super dating myself with this reference but ET: The Extraterrestrial was a box office smash in 1982 starring a toddler Drew Barrymore and a young Henry Thomas. And I’m super dating myself again with Barrymore because there’s probably a whole generation of adults who missed her adult comeback and have zero idea she was a star recently let alone that she was a child star way back in the early 1980s... but anyway, allow me to continue.