A husband in southeastern China has insisted on going Dutch with his wife for 40 years and even installed home surveillance cameras to monitor her; despite this, the wife wants to give their marriage another try.
The couple from Fujian province sought assistance from a local mediation TV show as their conflicts escalated.
The husband, identified by the surname Li, complained that his wife, surnamed Chen, had vandalised their home, writing curse words on the walls and even damaging the door with an axe.
He stated that her behaviour had depleted all his trust in her, prompting him to invest several thousand yuan in surveillance cameras to keep an eye on her.
Chen, on the other hand, argued that her unreasonable actions stemmed from Li’s emotional distance, which drove her to madness.
Last year, after suffering a stroke, she was hospitalised. Upon her discharge, her doctor recommended a restricted diet. Consequently, Li suggested they prepare meals separately.
Chen described this as the final straw after four decades of sharing expenses with her husband.
They met through a matchmaking service and have been splitting costs since their marriage.
Li believed that because both of them earned an income, dividing expenses was a fair approach to their lifestyle.
Chen expressed that this arrangement made her feel a lack of belonging, especially when compared to her parents, where her father allowed her mother to keep all his earnings.
Moreover, Li worked as a seaman before retiring, resulting in them spending little time together.
Chen had considered divorce, but her mother dissuaded her, insisting that it was her fate.
Li also felt it was unfair. He mentioned that he took care of Chen for months after her stroke and had previously cooked all the family’s meals.
Chen still wanted to give their marriage another chance, as they had been together for 40 years. She also apologised to Li for her aggressive behaviour.
However, Li stood firm in his distrust. The show’s mediators urged him to refrain from continually expressing distrust, as such negative remarks might hurt Chen’s feelings and jeopardise their relationship.
Ultimately, Li expressed his willingness to attempt to repair their fractured relationship, but he refused to remove the surveillance cameras.
“Let’s see how she behaves first,” he stated.
The show did not clarify whether the couple had children or what their children’s views might be regarding their parents’ marriage.
As the show went viral online, it ignited heated discussions about marriage, with many viewers suggesting that they should divorce.
“Such a suffocating relationship. It is better to be single,” one commenter stated.
“The old man was a sailor. He enjoyed himself out there and then came home to ignore his family,” remarked another.
“They should consider divorce if the man keeps tallying every little thing he does,” a third commenter added.
In China, divorce is not straightforward, as couples must undergo a 30-day cooling-off period after applying for a mutual-consent divorce. If either spouse refuses to divorce, the other must file for divorce through the court. -- SOUTH CHINA MORNING POST
