PETALING JAYA: Parents and young adults alike are beginning to speak openly about childhoods shaped by cultural pressures and the mental health struggles that often went unnoticed for years.
A woman who wished to be known only as Christina, 24, said she showed clear symptoms of anorexia, including frequent vomiting and gastrointestinal problems, which went untreated for two years.
During that time, she made repeated visits to general practitioners and gastroenterologists without understanding the underlying cause of her condition.
Christina said cultural norms influenced both her own understanding of anorexia and her mother’s response to it.
“Culturally, my mother’s dismissiveness was shaped by a normalised culture of body shaming and idealised thinness,” she said when contacted recently.
Christina admitted that such beliefs led to the normalisation of unrealistic standards.
Even after she was formally diagnosed with anorexia, Christina said her mother struggled to accept the seriousness of the disorder.
“She didn’t believe I needed therapy for a long time and was unaware of how severe my condition really was,” she said.
It was only two years after she first started showing symptoms that Christina began to see improvements in her eating disorder.
Meanwhile, social worker Sarah, 41, said she experienced severe obsessive-compulsive disorder symptoms from a very young age, including persistent and distressing intrusive thoughts.
When her symptoms worsened, she begged to see a psychologist at 19, but her request was dismissed.
“My dad grew up in an environment where mental health was never talked about.
“He had no understanding of mental health and insisted I speak to a family member instead,” she said.
“I couldn’t do that because I was terrified of what people would think of me. So I got a job and paid to see a psychologist myself.”
Sarah said therapy helped her understand her condition almost immediately.
“As soon as I started therapy, I realised what was happening, and the intrusive thoughts lost much of their power,” she said.
Although her struggles continued later in life, Sarah said she has since found a level of mental stability.
“At 33, I was referred to a psychiatrist and prescribed a high dose of antidepressants. Combined with ongoing therapy, that eventually led to my recovery and helped me be at peace with myself and life,” she said.
In contrast, retired English teacher and mother of two Oon Sok Imm, 67, said she has always encouraged open communication with her children about their emotions, a practice she continues today.
“I urge them to express their frustrations and anxieties. Both boys and girls should be allowed to open up – there is no such thing as ‘men cannot cry’,” she said.
Oon added that the key lies in creating a two-way channel of communication between parents and children.
“Parents should not only learn about their children’s mental health issues but also be open with their children about their struggles,” she said.
She suggested that face-to-face parent–child support groups could help make mental health a more accepted part of Malaysia’s cultural and national conversation.
