Is my loved one an alcoholic? How to spot the signs

One drink has different definitions of volume according to the amount of alcohol content the beverage contains. — TNS

Help, I think my father is an alcoholic. He drinks and drinks with his friends who are all big drinkers too. When my mother talks to him about it, he claims he can stop drinking any time. But he doesn’t. How can I tell if someone is an alcoholic?

These days, the socially-correct term to indicate alcoholism is alcohol use disorder.

Another term for it is alcohol abuse.

Alcohol use disorder covers a pattern of alcohol use that causes significant harm or distress, or problems functioning, in the affected person’s daily life.

It can be mild, moderate or severe.

This includes:

• Problems controlling their drinking.
• Being preoccupied with drinking alcohol.
• Continuing to use alcohol even when it causes problems for them, their job, their loved ones and their friends.
• Having to drink more and more to get the same effect.
• Having withdrawal symptoms when they rapidly decrease or stop drinking.

Alcohol use disorder also includes binge drinking.

What is binge drinking?

Binge drinking is a pattern of drinking where, if you are a man, you have five or more drinks within two hours.

If you are a woman, it is when you have four drinks within two hours.

It is also a dangerous way to drink alcohol.

So don’t think those after-work drinks you have with your colleagues at a bar or during social occasions don’t add up.

Especially bad are the rounds of “yam seng” you go through when you are at a dinner with family and friends.

Also very dangerous is the peer pressure to drink alcohol.

Those people who keep asking you to “have another drink” or who tell you that you are uncool for not wanting to drink another glass are not truly your friends.

How would I know if my father is an alcoholic? I mean, he says he is just a “social drinker”. What is the difference?

First, you have to know how a drink is measured.

Different types of alcoholic drinks have different types of alcohol content.

One drink is equal to:

• Twelve ounces of beer (around 5% alcohol content)
• Eight ounces of malt liquor (around 7% alcohol content)
• Five ounces of wine (around 12% alcohol content)
• 1.5 ounces of whiskey, vodka, rum, or gin (around 40% alcohol content).

A water glass usually holds 12oz, so you can compare with that measurement.

You are a social drinker if you have a low risk pattern of drinking.

This means that you consume only two drinks (according to the above definition) per day for men and one drink per day for women.

If you claim you don’t drink every day, then your maximum intake per week is 14 drinks for men and seven for women to still be considered a social drinker.

Oh. I am sure my father drinks more than that. At our recent Chinese New Year dinner, I saw him down seven beers at one sitting.

To help you determine if your father has alcohol use disorder, answer yes or no through your observation on his behalf to these questions (ideally, he should be the one answering the questions).

In the past year, have you:

• Had times when you ended up drinking more or longer than you intended?
• Wanted to cut down or stop drinking, or tried to, but couldn’t? Has this happened more than once?
• Spent a lot of time drinking and/or being sick or getting over the aftermath of drinking?
• Experienced cravings or a strong urge to drink?
• Found that drinking or being sick from drinking interfered with taking care of your home or job?
• Continued to drink even though it was causing trouble with your family or friends?
• Given up or reduced activities that were previously important, interesting or pleasurable in order to drink?
• Gotten into situations while or after drinking that increased your chances of getting hurt, such as driving, using machinery, walking in a dangerous area or having unsafe sex?
• Continued to drink even though it was making you feel depressed? Or did you drink even after having had a memory blackout?
• Had to drink much more than you once did to get the effect you want?
• Found that you had withdrawal symptoms, such as trouble sleeping, tremors, irritability, anxiety, depression, restlessness, nausea or sweating?

If the answer is yes to two or more of the questions above, then your father has alcohol use disorder.

I believe my father has alcohol use disorder. It is certainly making him spend less time at home with us, even when my mother quarrels with him about it. I have seen him pass out more than once. What can I do?

Denial is common in people who actually have alcohol use disorder.

They oftentimes feel like they don’t have a problem with drinking.

But if you are determined enough, even if he becomes angry with you, please do intervene.

Some people only recognise and accept that they have a problem after a blow-up with family members.

You can also ask a doctor or psychologist how to approach this problem with your father.

See Tell Me About next fortnight for the perils of drinking too much alcohol.

Dr YLM graduated as a medical doctor, and has been writing for many years on various subjects such as medicine, health, computers and entertainment. For further information, email [e-mail]. The information provided is for educational and communication purposes only, and it should not be construed as personal medical advice. Neither The Star nor the author gives any warranty on accuracy, completeness, functionality, usefulness or other assurances as to such information. The Star and the author disclaim all responsibility for any losses, damage to property or personal injury suffered directly or indirectly from reliance on such information.