This needlework piece was done to celebrate the writer’s first Christmas with her mum in Petaling Jaya in 2010. Photos: Sheela Kanagasabai
In 1957, my father bought a Singer sewing machine and retained the original receipt. Even though the shop offered flexible payment options free of interest, he parted with his savings to buy this valuable fixture for my late mother.
He had quietly watched my mother sewing and pricking her fingers while mending all our clothes the conventional way. However, she was a picture of calm and serenity whenever she used the new machine with efficiency.
My mother was encouraged to sew very early in life. Raised in a Catholic convent for girls, she learnt the art of slow hand-stitching from the French nuns who taught the boarders Home Science.
I can still hear her say these words whenever I was too impatient and considered myself suffering from sewing-specific disability: “Don’t worry if you are not an experienced stitcher. Running stitch and cross-stitch are all you really need.”
My approach is that “slow stitching” should be exactly that, and I did not want to hunch over a sewing machine. I spent many youthful years unconvinced that stitching was really for me. Even though I admired other people’s handwork, I just felt very intimidated by the task itself.
This cross-stitch piece was the writer's first attempt at sewing.
Fortunately, my sister had a real talent in both crochet and tatting. She eased into knot and lacework using yarn crafting by just following the instructions in a DIY manual. All you need are two things – a crochet hook and yarn. She said crochet is not difficult, but learning how to crochet can be a bit challenging initially.
Having learnt the basic techniques and simple stitches like the chain, slip stitch, single crochet, double crochet, she created lovely lacey borders for table cloth, pillow cases, and even dollies. In envy, I endeavoured but lamely surrendered in frustration over the time-consuming process.
Mastering any craft takes patience and practice, said my mother and sister.
Soon I was married and, between juggling a career and family, I had no time to even thread a needle.
Yet, through the years, I kept browsing Cross Stitcher magazine and crafting samplers in bookshops and charity markets. Therein were a lot of talented designers showcasing their original pattern charts, techniques and new sewing tools. Cross-stitch is considered a popular hobby among sewists who share their online blogs with the sewing community.
As I awaited the birth of my baby, I somehow embraced the wonderful world of needle craft, by trying my hand at cross-stitch.
Cross-stitching involves several stitches and techniques that you need to master to create beautiful embroidery which includes cross, fractional, back stitch and French knots. I became hooked on creating something beautifully unique with just coloured thread, and have not looked back since.
I also realised that cross-stitching brings mental health benefits. It can help reduce stress and anxiety, improve concentration, and boost my mood while I focus on the task at hand. It became a form of meditation which helped clear my mind and made me feel more centred.
As it grew on me, I started creating landscape and portrait gifts for loved ones – on denim and canvas, wall hangings, pillow and quilted designs on linen and cotton fabric. It was a great way to explore my artistic side and develop my skills.
Sewing has made me the person I am, because it has shaped my thoughts and given me a means to make tangible the ideas and beliefs I have.
I feel accomplished when I make something beautiful and functional.
Making something with my own hands fulfils my need to be practical and experimental. Since it is my own creation, this feeling is addictive and therapeutic. There is an element of connectedness that I get out of sewing, that comes from an overwhelming sense of satisfaction.
My mother believed that creativity enriches our lives. Cross-stitching can give your brain a much-needed rest from the constant stimulation of technology and social media. When you stitch, you are using your hands and brain in a different way than you do when you are scrolling through your phone or computer. This can help you disconnect and unwind. While many may regard it as tedious and old-fashioned, sewing is such an important skill for survival.
I did not inherit that Singer sewing machine from my mother, but I still hand-sew and share my designs with friends and family, no matter the occasion. I consider myself a hobbyist sewer and regard the needle and thread as accessible tools that allow me to connect with myself and fellow human beings.
