Lahad Datu - A year later: Life a nightmare, says widow

A year after Police Sergeant Azis Sarikon was gunned down in Semporna’s Kg Simunul during the March 2 ambush by Sulu gunmen, his family have yet to come to terms with his tragic death.

In fact, life has become a nightmare for his widow Siti Bandora and her four children, Mohd Faridzel Helmi, 20, Liyana Abd Aziz, 17, Nurul Sazwani Aziz, 14, Mohd Aiman Hakimi, 9.

“As the days passed, our feelings of loss and helplessness increased. We miss him more each day and being a mother, I try my best to hide my feelings and try to be stronger for them,” said Siti.

“I am worried for (my children). I fear they will never recover from the shock and sadness of their father’s sudden death,” she said.

She said this was reflected in the children’s school exam results.

 

“They used to come home with good results and were among the top in their respective classes. Now, it is all bad results,” said the housewife.

“I really don’t know how to help them apart from pretending that I have moved on. I constantly remind them to do so,” said a tearful Siti.

Siti said she had little emotional support from others.

“Sometimes, I have to remind myself that he really is gone and will never return. I have to make myself happy,” she said, adding that at times, her youngest child often asks when his father was coming home.

Siti says she tells him that he would only be able to see his father when he gets to heaven himself.

“To make us feel better, I take Liyana and Aiman, who are living with me to visit their father’s grave,” she said.

Siti says her two other children – Mohd Faridzel, who is studying in Universiti Malaysia Sabah (UMS), and Nurul, who is at boarding school – are coping better.

“I really wish to see (all my children) grow up happy people, and remember that their father died a hero,” she said.

For now, all Siti can do is pray and hope that her family will learn to let go and move on with their lives.

Related stories:

Family still pines for slain cop

Wife recalls last moments with husband

God tests those He loves

Widow of slain commando continues with life courageously