Understanding the nature of children

Nature vs nurture: Children are born with different temperaments.- AFP PHOTO/PATRICK HERTZOG

I have two children who are as different as night and day. In fact, they conform perfectly to your description of the “strong-willed” and “compliant” children. One is a spitfire, the other is a sweetheart. I am very interested in knowing more about what this means for them long-term. Beyond everyday issues of discipline and relating within a family, what can you tell me about these kids?

You’ll be interested to know that more than 35,000 parents participated in a study I conducted to answer those specific questions. It is described in detail in my book Parenting Isn’t for Cowards, but let me boil down 11 of the most important findings. Remember that these conclusions represent common traits and characteristics that may or may not apply to your two children. These descriptions represent what typically happens with strong-willed children (SWC) and very compliant children (CC) as the years unfold.