PETALING JAYA: 56-year old Florence Shin, is presently battling leukemia. She says that the toughest thing she has had to face in her life was going to sleep without knowing if she would make it to another day.
"My doctor, my family and everyone around me constantly tell me that I should stop thinking about death and focus on living, but truth be told, I don't possess determination of that nature.
"I was diagnosed with acute lymphochytic leukemia four years ago and though it was detected at a pretty advanced stage, my doctor then was very confident that I will be alright," she said.
Florence added that it was not easy for her as some insensitive people had passed remarks like 'it is a good thing this came along after you have lived your life' and 'these things happen, just do whatever you need to do and mentally prepare yourself'.
"I am however blessed as my husband Joseph and my son, Andrew have been my pillars through this testing time.
"My bone marrow donor was found almost immediately after my diagnosis and my doctor often told me that he still couldn't believe how he possessed the right DNA to qualify as my donor.
'Maybe it was god's will or maybe it was just a curse, because after battling for two years and being told I had recovered, I later experienced the symptoms again only to find that I was one of the few who had a relapse.
She said that the doctor told her it was due to her poor immunity and despite being an obedient patient, she has many battles ahead.
"I am often told to be grateful and yes I am, but I worry about my husband who had spent everyday in this last four years crying by my bedside, telling me he cant live a life without me.
"My son, who had put aside everything else in life, including his relationships and his job and his social life to look after me.
"I sometimes think their life would be easier if I died, at the same time, I want to see my son married and I want to hold my grandchildren.
Cancer survivor Serena Shalini, 45 was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was 32. She says that though life is different for her, she is glad that the doctors managed to save her life.
" I am an accountant, and one day a few ladies in my office were talking about getting a mammogram as they saw an advertisement for breast cancer awareness.
"I agreed and I am grateful I did, because when the doctor sat me down to tell me I had cancer, all I could think about was my 3 year old daughter and my year old son," she said.
She considered herself as 'one of the lucky few' who managed to get detected at the early stages.
"The doctors constantly reminded me on how early detection had saved my life, but cancer itself- changed my life.
"As lucky as I may seem, I was having a rocky relationship with my husband and this was the perfect excuse for him to walk out on me and I could not do anything except be glad that he did not initiate a custody battle with me," she said.
Serena said that following her surgery to remove her cancer, she was told to attend a few sessions of chemotherapy, which she initially refused in fear of her appearance.
" One night as I was trying to sleep, my little girl sneaked into my room, knelt at the end of my bed and said, mommy when things get better, I promise I wont ask for ice cream or pretty clothes, I will also take care of Joshua.
"That was when I knew I had to do it for my children and so I did,yes I became weak and I had some severe hair loss, my doctor told me it will grow back and it did, I lost a lot of weight and looked nothing like the person I was before, but I was there for my children and that drove me to recover from the state I was," she said.
She added that It was a tough journey and thanked her sister Shamini for being there for her throughout.
"As I said earlier, I was one of the lucky few, I had a supportive family member, and I call for all those who do not, to reach out to focus groups and fellow survivors as we understand what you are going through.
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