The death of a beloved pet is a sad event and can even be confusing for children who do not understand the concept of permanence just yet.
The death of a pet can be a shock for young children who do not yet understand the concept of permanence the way older children or adults do.
There are things you can do to help guide your child, gently and lovingly through sadness, confusion and stress that accompany such an event.
Tactile toddlers in particular will seek out extra cuddles and hugs, needing to be held for reassurance. The trick is to let them come to you and be aware that they may fluctuate between pushing you away to pulling you close. This physical expression is directly linked to their confusion about the situation. Sometimes a young child can transfer their confusion onto younger children or another pet, so make sure you at clear about what is and isn’t acceptable behaviour.
Auditory children tend to need lots of explanations, some which can be difficult to give. Divert this process by sharing stories of when you lost your pet and how you felt. If the mood gets a bit dreary, talk about all the fun times you all had and bring the conversation into the positive.
Another trait auditory children have is to tell everybody everything, so don’t be surprised if they cherry announce to the grocer or school teacher in detail that their pet had died. This is not them being insensitive, but rather a way of accepting difficult-to-digest information through repetition.
Most people clean out the cage and area the pet previously held, but for a visual child this can be disturbing. If possible try to keep things visually the same, at least for a short time and when change is necessary, do your best to do it slowly or replace the space where the cage was with something else to “fill in” the area.
It isn’t unusual for a visual child to become a little possessive of other things in their life; being particular about the order or visual display of food, clothes or personal items. This is simply about trying to gain control in their environment at a time where they are feeling loss.
Expect your taste and smell child to be more clingy and emotional during the mourning period.
They may burst into tears at the simplest of things and become quiet or difficult to manage as they try to get a hold on the emotions they are feeling. Taste and smell children are known for feeling transference, so be aware when they become hysterical about odd things like not having the right coloured pencil. It isn’t the pencil that bothers them, they have transferred their feelings about the loss of their pet to the more tangible item of a pencil.
By guiding your child with kindness assurance and understanding through the difficult event of the loss of a pet, you will be teaching them important skills necessary for being able to cope with challenges later in life. – McClatchy-Tribune Information Services
Limited time offer:
Just RM5 per month.
